I have this small plaque on my desk that declares, “The Ultimate Inspiration is the Deadline.” Working in communications, especially for a small high-tech company, my life is extremely deadline driven. It seems that there is so much to do that very few things get attention prior to the last minute, then there is a mad scramble punctuated by brilliant ideas and seamlessly executed production.
Maybe that’s why I’ve been feeling so uninspired lately. I don’t have any major deadlines in sight. I’ve always been a solution-oriented, results-focused individual. I like a goal and I like a plan.
Right now I don’t seem to have either.
Don’t get me wrong, there are a lot of things going on at work, and I am certainly slogging through them, but delivery isn’t due on the earliest items until sometime next week. Ho-hum.
But more so than work, I feel like I’m in limbo with some of my health issues. It’s been a week now since my check-up so I should be hearing back from my tests any day. But this waiting and not knowing what the plan is to treat — or at least further explore — issues with the rapid heart beat, etc. has got me mired in a state of inaction.
The same is true of my upcoming rotator cuff surgery. I’m within 30 days, but it’s not quite soon enough for me to go in for my pre-op work, or start stocking the fridge, or all the other “nest-building” things I do prior to having surgery.
I know I should enjoy this time as an opportunity to get caught up, take things at a slower pace, do work at something less than a frenetic schedule. Unfortunately, I’m just not wired that way. I get restless, antsy, and irritable. Frankly, I get a bit bored. I need action items. I need a schedule with milestones and deadlines. I need to understand what the end game is and how we’re going to get there.
(You have to understand I’ve now been off caffeine for over three weeks. Imagine what I was like before.)
And more than anything, I want to feel better, and right now I don’t have a plan to make that happen.
I hope your plans come together today. Thanks for checking in.