Since laughter really is [sometimes] the best medicine, I couldn’t help but share this with you. Enjoy.
25 Ways to Tell You’re Grown Up
- Your houseplants are alive and you can’t smoke any of them.
- Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
- You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
- 6:00 am is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
- You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
- You watch the weather channel.
- Your friends marry and divorce instead of “hook up” and “break up.”
- You go from 130 days of vacation to 14.
- Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as “dress up.”
- You’re the one calling the police because those %@&# kids won’t turn down the music.
- Older relatives feel comfortable telling sexy jokes around you.
- You don’t know what time Taco Bell closes any more.
- Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
- You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald’s leftovers.
- Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
- You take naps.
- Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
- Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3:00 am would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
- You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
- A $4 bottle of wine is no longer “pretty good sh–.”
- You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
- “I just can’t drink the way I used to” replaces “I’m never going to drink that much again.”
- 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
- You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
- When you find out your friend is pregnant, you congratulate her instead of asking, “What the hell happened?”
- BONUS! You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn’t apply to you and you can’t find one to save your sorry old hide.